https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma daily 0.75 2025-10-21 https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/5-books-for-grieving-people monthly 0.5 2024-11-23 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1732341826302-YH09XJZQPANM7OVG8PM9/71aCawGKp3L.jpg Blog - 5 books for grieving people - The Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller Therapist Francis Weller shares his profound and moving perspective on the necessity and vitality of grief. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1732341827400-582CO8PSFIL4RWC5JN2D/the-year-of-magical-thinking-1.jpg Blog - 5 books for grieving people - The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion Novelist and memoirist Joan Didion’s incisive account of devastating personal losses. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1732341822342-U3JFPDYUXPNCHNH0UZGU/91vwa09H50L._AC_UF1000%2C1000_QL80_.jpg Blog - 5 books for grieving people - Notes on Grief by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie remembers her father in this touching account of the events around his death. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1732341825072-BWH02KGGNS49JPWGM9W1/Flat-Image_-Bittersweet-TR_2-996x1536.jpeg Blog - 5 books for grieving people - Bittersweet by Susan Cain This book is not specifically about loss, but it speaks about how embracing sorrow and longing in our lives can be beneficial. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1732341877936-B4H2FAG8A0IMJ3RUDXOV/mart_custom-32d5ea2108d92243d443b714af65c92bc3f6dbd6.jpg Blog - 5 books for grieving people - Crying in H Mart Michelle Zauner writes about her mom’s illness and death as she reckons with her own Korean identity. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/on-trusting-yourself monthly 0.5 2024-11-23 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1732340196723-OGDV2EKV3NRDWZYXCMV3/unsplash-image-3IuwkHNn9Z0.jpg Blog - On trusting yourself - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/a-few-small-but-important-things-i-keep-in-mind-to-help-my-clients-recover monthly 0.5 2024-09-04 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1725428438621-I314TUIZXR9YWDH7D249/unsplash-image-NPTCCLBzmyk.jpg Blog - A few small but important things I keep in mind to help my clients recover - Make it stand out Learning new skills to help you in your recovery takes lots of practice and repetition. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/when-it-hurts-to-know-your-worth monthly 0.5 2024-09-04 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1725425347932-DZ9MR2DVHGGJT4B5K7KW/unsplash-image-ZSCsXWyR7c0.jpg Blog - “I know I’m worthy, I just don’t believe it.” - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/what-does-resourcing-mean-in-emdr-therapy monthly 0.5 2024-09-04 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1725422233382-QUST8ZP8UWJD6C1MPP9Z/unsplash-image-z9F_yK4Nmf8.jpg Blog - What does “resourcing” mean in EMDR therapy? A forest journey metaphor - Make it stand out Resourcing is much like packing for a hike—you want to make sure you have everything you need to make the journey as safe and successful as possible. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/emdr-briefly-explained monthly 0.5 2024-03-25 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1710913769346-FCS7RU6ZTLDUU7U3GKCN/Screenshot+2024-03-20+at+1.49.23+PM.png Blog - EMDR, Briefly explained https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1710913773682-RI39E3LND1J7DUOXXMUT/Screenshot+2024-03-20+at+1.47.54+PM.png Blog - EMDR, Briefly explained https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/my-new-space monthly 0.5 2024-01-31 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705743998207-DO31J19AM3WV1MA0AJRO/IMG_7197.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705743997988-IC0ARE7NV6P6SG2YFGRL/IMG_7196.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705743976185-DLB8X315HQ8YJ0T2W247/IMG_7198.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705744015475-71A6FZN7A7R50OL4NDFS/IMG_7195.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705744014584-QQYEA0OL2BR0KANQQEGR/IMG_7194.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705744026156-SSZZ7GSFKQ6IQJBO8H1O/IMG_7193.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705744033748-4BBO42P2IRNG4D96KN1B/IMG_7192.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705744039352-67CKT2S4OMDZ4C8F9Y2S/IMG_7191.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705744053154-55B34RL94CN71YPU31GP/IMG_7190.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1705744053474-5EHS060CYOHQ66EA7YED/IMG_7189.JPG Blog - Welcome to my therapy space https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/film-review-good-grief monthly 0.5 2024-01-15 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/7a7fd5d3-9dc0-40b9-a86a-91740572ab23/Good-Grief-Cast-Netflix-Celia-Imrie-Imelda.jpg Blog - Film review: Good Grief - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/470be762-4c1c-4823-8e4d-1cd2bd4d8cd3/Screenshot+2024-01-15+at+7.39.55+AM.png Blog - Film review: Good Grief - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/613a302a-07ad-4119-b505-daba2641cfff/Screenshot+2024-01-15+at+8.00.43+AM.png Blog - Film review: Good Grief - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/when-new-years-day-is-your-dads-death-anniversary monthly 0.5 2024-01-01 https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/knowing-whats-true-and-real-during-trauma-recovery monthly 0.5 2023-12-04 https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/why-i-had-to-complicate-myself-in-order-to-healnbsp monthly 0.5 2023-03-02 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/335038ad-f7b2-4408-a329-278b002fe766/white-out-beyond-ideas-of-wrongdoing-and-right.jpg Blog - Why I had to complicate myself in order to heal  - Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I’ll meet you there. When the soul lies down in that grass the world is too full to talk about. — Rumi https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/why-do-we-feel-anxiety-physically monthly 0.5 2022-12-08 https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/recovery-as-a-process monthly 0.5 2022-11-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/ea033456-d4b6-4b1c-9c03-d64e53ade30f/Screen+Shot+2022-10-18+at+1.28.41+PM.png Blog - Recovery as a process - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/9ea6b9de-65c3-4296-bacc-d01f67038f68/flat%2C750x%2C075%2Cf-pad%2C750x1000%2Cf8f8f8.jpeg Blog - Recovery as a process - Make it stand out Coddiwomple: to travel purposefully towards an as-yet-unknown destination. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/what-is-complex-trauma monthly 0.5 2022-11-10 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1665579826053-ED9WJU8D48ONROTU9NBK/unsplash-image-TYnHpsuAkBg.jpg Blog - What is complex trauma? - Make it stand out Complex trauma lives up to its name. Living with C-PTSD can often feel like being deeply entangled with the thoughts, emotions, sensations that arose from the adversity you went through. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/def2d737-e4b2-4a65-b4f7-74c03220588f/Screen%2BShot%2B2022-08-22%2Bat%2B1.34.15%2BPM.png Blog - What is complex trauma? - Make it stand out Source: The Practical Guide for Healing Developmental Trauma by Laurence Heller and Brad Kammer (2022) https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/how-can-therapy-help-with-anxiety-when-the-source-is-outside-of-our-control monthly 0.5 2022-10-10 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1665200065185-KGWFY2SUHEXUW9ATVRSW/unsplash-image-qNk6VylB5AU.jpg Blog - How can therapy help with anxiety when the source is outside of our control? - Make it stand out When multiple issues are impacting us, it’s normal to feel anxious. This is a valid reason to seek the support of a therapist. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1665201022216-P93W1FDMMP1MX477R3CS/unsplash-image-iw4IMo-T-Fg.jpg Blog - How can therapy help with anxiety when the source is outside of our control? - Make it stand out We’re slowly moving past strict pandemic measures in Hong Kong, but our collective conversation about anxiety (and mental health more generally) needs to stay alive and active. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/what-is-trauma monthly 0.5 2022-10-18 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1664858000450-HC0IFA1KNFI1CF4WU5RC/unsplash-image-klwak-FdEiA.jpg Blog - What is trauma? - Make it stand out When we’re traumatized, it’s like our body’s stress response “cup” is overflowing. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/the-trouble-with-trauma-and-mindfulness monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638472729959-PI6KPUKAJSDHXAW5MRB7/unsplash-image-uftqFbfWGFY.jpg Blog - The trouble with trauma and mindfulness - Make it stand out For survivors of trauma, mindfulness practices can trigger an emotional storm. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638473592338-YJ1B19VHGMLA9DO73E2R/unsplash-image-niH7Z81S44g.jpg Blog - The trouble with trauma and mindfulness - Make it stand out Meditation is not the only way to experience the benefits of mindfulness. Bringing awareness to your present moment and experiences can happen anytime, anywhere. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/emotional-triggers-part-5 monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638423916200-6Z1U37TSLPYKZ1QOL1DM/unsplash-image-HqxPE-iNRco.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 05: Triggers, relationships, and co-regulation - Make it stand out Triggers can profoundly impact our relationships, but relationships also offer a key site for understanding and tending to our triggers. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/9645e771-6d86-4d81-a40f-706d275ce667/EX7qWl4XYAEG1Lm.png Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 05: Triggers, relationships, and co-regulation - Make it stand out Source: The Gottman Institute on Twitter https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638470916495-8BLSYUEQOVGOHA56MIQV/unsplash-image-jXmeOG-XNEA.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 05: Triggers, relationships, and co-regulation - Make it stand out When it feels scary to connect with another human, pets can be great co-regulation partners. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/challenging-narratives-of-perfection-in-healing monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638427566274-HCJRRJMMEFIPDRL03NH9/unsplash-image-jR2KrXwnRho.jpg Blog - Challenging narratives of perfection in healing - Make it stand out The lotus flower reminds us that it’s OK to fall apart and experience regrowth sometimes. We don’t always have to be on an upward trajectory. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/emotional-triggers-part-4 monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638423615588-LRITIRUV31D6CK34KYRH/unsplash-image-qvoTNCj8BjI.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 04: Coping with triggers - Make it stand out Coping with triggers is not about stopping them altogether, but increasing our options when they arise so we have more flexibility and freedom in how we respond. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/b3e26486-8ab2-4bba-b02f-d17d08055124/Screen+Shot+2021-12-02+at+1.02.52+PM.png Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 04: Coping with triggers - Make it stand out Click to enlarge. Source: sydneyaddictionsrecovery.com https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638468845103-91SW7YHQEWLBKGBCD1JV/unsplash-image-ezOKZhYJAFo.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 04: Coping with triggers - Make it stand out There is hope for lessening the impact of emotional triggers. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/thinking-prompts-how-can-others-benefit-from-what-youve-learned-in-therapy monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638430116390-X0VSSDS546CPKCT2FB7N/unsplash-image-9rzI0FuCS_s.jpg Blog - Thinking prompts: How can others benefit from what you’ve learned in therapy? - Make it stand out You are at the centre of your process in therapy, but oftentimes, your cherished loved ones feel the positive impacts as well. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/emotional-triggers-part-3 monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638423505949-LYTC3UWJLJW3Q7UTAECZ/unsplash-image-mHdDmdeyVb4.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 03: Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn - Make it stand out Sometimes, a freeze response can be triggered, which can lead us to be immobile, feeling panicked yet unable to take action. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638465349871-BHXQ5K36VKH2LQH50XAO/unsplash-image-TlwzgNd54Pw.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 03: Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn - Make it stand out The term ‘fawn’ is used to describe a trauma response that prompts us to appease or calm someone who is threatening us. Remember that this is an attempt to stay safe from harm. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/visual-guide-to-emotions monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638428584419-89IDN6FLVYPI2PG8AHU8/unsplash-image-FtZL0r4DZYk.jpg Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1662360949278-67C7W143476CFYOCMMJS/1.png Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1662360949807-WIIUX44KZN6TKA94FFJX/2.png Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1662360955900-8ME0M3XD9P0BCE7A8NGP/3.png Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1662360958758-M1MLV32LXLIWUHL2B8Q1/4.png Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1662360966057-U8DUXC8UQJ88MWIIYNOC/5.png Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1662360966776-XZCVPKHGELANDS2G24D0/6.png Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1662360972891-CWKFKKA0NEKUCCXUTFXK/7.png Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1662360973484-F25YWVKH7Z6TIKYGSNUY/8.png Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1662360976853-9B6L4DL0ESD5SH0GWBOZ/9.png Blog - Visual guide: How do emotions shape our experiences? https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/emotional-triggers-part-2-zl5ba monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638418702989-N3GN6LUDYION46ZL072R/unsplash-image-bwki71ap-y8.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 02: The neuroscience of being triggered - Make it stand out Triggers can happen in social situations or in relationships, when we are reminded of past traumas related to abandonment or abuse. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638419688584-34BEED2ICYQ53K65CVMD/unsplash-image-md7cCWYVq9U.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 02: The neuroscience of being triggered - Make it stand out Being triggered can be an isolating experience, and learning why it happens is one important part of learning how to cope with traumatic stress. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638419902200-2ZJ30A80SSQW2J2B5IJ6/unsplash-image-SL6riDglfak.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 02: The neuroscience of being triggered - Make it stand out Understanding how your mind works in tandem with your partner’s can help reduce the impact of triggers—more on that in part five. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638422133104-V0FG63KOBM0IMYLA2O2F/unsplash-image-GygPFmXGD1o.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 02: The neuroscience of being triggered - Make it stand out Imagine your brain’s neural networks as branches of a river. With time and effort, you can redirect the water into newer branches. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/the-problem-with-resilience-ch563 monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638424603955-18FFCP55OROD5D7EE9UF/unsplash-image--rLZUw89NrI.jpg Blog - The problem with resilience - Make it stand out It’s OK not to feel the same as you did before your trauma. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638425932523-IB00EF6LKEB8ZT23SQZN/unsplash-image-0aMMMUjiiEQ.jpg Blog - The problem with resilience - Make it stand out It’s easier to access and utilize our own resilience when we have others on our team. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638426663120-XO7SO6WIMYWWXEXZEPXY/unsplash-image-SIU1Glk6v5k.jpg Blog - The problem with resilience - Make it stand out When we rethink big ideas like resilience, we can discover new pathways for understanding the complexities of being human. https://www.alliruttger.com/thoughts-on-stress-and-trauma/emotional-triggers-part-1 monthly 0.5 2022-09-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638413509801-OOE2Z867CEA33MJXHOLN/unsplash-image-I8gQVrDcXzY.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 01: What are they? What are they not? - Make it stand out Triggers are rooted in traumatic events from our past. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638416127890-DNC49TDD8TSP67XO3NZO/unsplash-image-oTHXpT6nJsE.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 01: What are they? What are they not? - Make it stand out Being triggered is much more than “just” responding to an emotionally charged situation. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6046557365def40d4d68be00/1638417608505-HM43G4Y3MZUYXIQCQZQI/unsplash-image-FVRTLKgQ700.jpg Blog - All about emotional triggers | Part 01: What are they? 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